Wednesday, September 16, 2009

Mama's Don't Let Your Babies...

Mama's Don't Let Your Babies Grow up to be Insurance Salesmen... I apologize if you hear Willie Nelson's voice for the rest of the night now. I really do.

My brother was a cowboy in a way. Guess he still is, but as I've shared with you before, he is now an insurance salesmen.

Yesterday, my cell phone rings... (imagine the Wicked Witch tune while she's flying through the air on her bicycle - maybe that will change the song going through your head)

My brother. I'll give him a half a point credit for trying to start the conversation about me instead of him by asking a question about my life. Well, it's Brian, so I'll give him a full point.

The next question:

"Do you want to buy some life insurance?"

"No, I really don't. Besides, I have some with my company."

Then comes the sales pitch.

"Brian, I don't really have any money for life insurance right now."

"I'll pay for it for a little while, I just need the applications, you know?"

SIGH!

"I'll catch up with you this week. And you have to have a nicotine swab. Don't have to have a blood test or anything, I can do it. Just make sure you aren't a smoker."

Are you kidding me?

I came back into the office (I had to walk out to get phone reception) with a twitch. Christi asked, "what did your brother want?"

"Did I say something to make you think it was him?"

"No, I can just tell."

Later, I relayed the conversation to my parents.

Mom says, "guess he didn't meet his monthly quota. Tell him you don't have any money." She got a kick out of the nicotine swab part.

Dad tells me, "tell him you don't want it. Ask him who you are going to leave the money to. Besides, not to sound bad, but a person only needs enough life insurance to be buried. If you are trying to get rich on someone..."

"Mom is the beneficiary on my current policy. Does she have plans to off me?"

"Well, that's something to think about."

Mom really didn't have a comment for this.

So, if anyone needs home, renter's, car or life insurance, I'll hook you up with a salesman. He'll come right along with application and nicotine swab in hand. Get ready!

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