Monday, May 30, 2011

Eat more kiwi!

The past 7-10 days rank up there among the most frustrating and difficult that I've had in a while. This past week was one of those weeks where absolutely nothing went smoothly. What should have been the simplest of tasks turned out to be difficult each and every time. There seemed to be a problem with everything.

At work and outside of work. And patience. I remember throughout my life praying for patience for myself. This past week had I really been on the right track, I would have been praying for patience for everyone else. EVERYone wanted something right then.

Right now, we are working on two children's books about teaching the fruits of the Spirit. Patience is one of those fruits. For some reason, I have decided that I will make the patience fruit be a kiwi. My mantra as I kept getting "right now" emails became much like that of Chick-fil-a... EAT MORE KIWI!!!

So, here, I reveal my secret code message... If you see on my Facebook, "Eat more kiwi!!!", that signals, "many people need many things, and I am doing the best I can. Please be patient."

Women especially get to the point where they just need a good cry. Especially when they are frustrated, and just sometimes you just need a good cry. Some days are just like that. I've cried more in the past week than I have in a while. This transitions into my next topic.

When I need confirmation that I really don't need a relationship in my life, I log on to singles sites and read profiles. This also confirms that e-Harmony was right, I'm not compatible in general. It makes me realize, "you know, I really don't want this in my life." I kid you not, this is what I just came upon:


"If you have depression, mania, or some other psychological medical ailment, you are fine to give me a holler, but a requirement from me in this situation is that you listen to your physician and take your medication as prescribed by your physician. I don't need that special time of the month coming up (like it does each month) and then to compound the situation I find out that you are also on a roller coaster ride because you decided not to follow the doctor's medical plan."

Alrighty, then... Though my bad week last week had a heck of a lot to do with work overload, a kiwi-deficiancy among the general public, the fact that Karen's replacement doesn't start until June 6, at least three mailings needed to go out, and a number of things completely out of my control, I'm not stupid either. Some months are worse than others, but that's not my point. Really, seriously? You are going to go there on a singles site profile?

That's OK, I have real issues with how much he brags about taking a private jet back and forth around the country. If you really want to impress a woman back off of how much of a "jet" person you are, and don't mandate Midol. I hope you are jetting off to see your mommy every four weeks because bless your poor future wife's heart, she's going to need it.

Some things should be left to later conversations via email, phone, etc. Here, I'll just randomly share a few more thoughts from men which may not leave the best first impression.
 
"On my profile it says I go to church an average 2 times a month, by some peoples standard that is a below par attendance for a Christian, but hey we are not suppose to judge or isn't that what our religion is all about."
 
I just found a profile that's not bad in what it says, but I am curious about the photos. Four photos of himself. All taken from the driver's seat of his car like while he's in a drive thru. Actually, one looks like a mug shot for getting caught running a toll booth or a red light or something. And they were all taken at different times.
 
I just bypassed the guy on another site that was wearing a purple bow tie. Though the purple should have had me for a second, the bow tie is just a no-no to me.
 
I really need to be doing other things right now, so I'll leave you with this. My peeve is people who don't know how to fill out a form correctly on these sites. He did not answer the question to how many previous marriages, so it looks like he has none. However, he has four children (thank goodness he says that he "has enough already" when it asks his thoughts on children). UH... please tell me you were married once. Guess that was the case since somewhere else it shows "widowed".

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