I am posting this because of a new running joke that came about today, and to crack the code of my Tweets and status updates on Facebook, just in case you ever have a hard time figuring them out.

When I say:
"I must have picked out the itchiest clothes in my closet today."

I mean:
"Wow, this sweater sure is scratchy." Or "Man, I have dry skin and itch, but I am going to blame it on my clothes."

What I don't mean:
"Someone sure is being something that rhymes with witchy."


When I say:
"My mom called me to..."

I mean:
"My mom called me."

What I don't mean:
"Someone other than my mom called me."


When I say:
"I sure wish the weather would stop changing, it's making my head hurt."

I mean:
"I have a headache. I think it is the change in the barometric pressure, but I could just need caffeine."

What I don't mean:
"Somebody hit me in the head with an umbrella." (That is a joke directed to Amanda.) Or "Someone is giving me a headache."


When I say;
"I need a frappachino."

I mean:
"I want a frappachino." It could be, "I am stressed and want a frappachino." Or "I am thirsty and a frappachino would be a tasty treat.

What I don't mean:
"I want a V8."


If I missed anything that you may have questions or are confused about, please let me know.