Monday, March 14, 2016

Most dramatic finale ever is always a false promise on #thebachelor

It better be as dramatic tonight as Chris Harrison has been promising all season, but I doubt it will be. My dramatic meter may be a little off whack. There's been enough drama around my life, that it takes a lot of drama to move my needle.

We may be in for a long three hours. Chris teases that there may be a wedding at the end of "After the Final Rose." Last week on "The Women Tell All," Ben said he was ready to marry the person he chose. The show has flown in both women's families, Neil Lane with the wedding rings, and Ben's minister from Warsaw, IN.

I bet the drama is there is no wedding.

We see Lauren talking about it being so hard to believe she's here at the end in Jamaica. She has so many feelings for Ben and can't imagine anyone else feeling like her. (Well, why not.)

JoJo has no doubts that she and Ben are in this together. It's the perfect relationship. 

Both women are wearing cut off denim shorts similar to the ones I almost commented "please no one buy these because no one wants to see your butt hanging out" on a Facebook post in a local buy, sell, trade group. 

Meanwhile Ben has his doubts. He has no clue what he is going to do. He needs the advice and support of his parents. 

Ben tells his family that he loves both women and has told them so. It's disturbing to his mom that he's in love with two women.


Lauren is first. Ben describes her as gorgeous, sweet and loved Warsaw. Ben tells the story how on their very first date that she said, "I want to meet your parents." It was in response to hearing so many great things about hem.

Dad tells Lauren that there is a twinkle in Ben's eyes when he talks about her that she has never seen before. He asks her if she is in love with Ben. Lauren says that she is. She asks Dad if she thinks that Ben is ready to settle down and get married. Dad David says yes, then turns the question on her.

Lauren tells Mom she was surprised when Ben said, "I love you." They talk about Ben's insecure side. Lauren asks Mom how she can help Ben through those moments and be a support in life. Mom gives some wisdom.

Mom and Ben talk. You can tell she is skeptical. She asks if the two women know how he feels about each of them.

When Ben and Lauren get a chance to talk, she says, "I am in love with you, but marriage is big for me. I will only get married once... I am ready to get engaged." She adds to camera, "I would marry Ben tomorrow."

With that short date, Ben puts Lauren in a car for now, and off she goes.

On to JoJo. When she arrives, she's very nervous. She feels lots of pressure. We don't really know what Ben has told his family before she arrives.

There's something about Lauren that I haven't really liked her all season. At least I haven't been wild about her. However, I have plain out not liked JoJo. The fact that her name is JoJo (actually that she goes by a nickname like that) sure hasn't helped.

JoJo tells the parents how nervous she is and talks about how crazy she is about their son. Ben tells them they have moments together that he'll never forget. A rooftop in Mexico City, a helicopter ride in Vegas...

Dad expects a lot. JoJo tells him that Ben is the picture she envision of a husband and father for his children. She's very emotional which Dad appreciates.

JoJo is most nervous about talking to Mom. JoJo talks about telling Ben that she loves him and what he said back. I don't know how mom kept a straight face. Mom seems more into JoJo than Lauren. Mom says they have both used the word "safe" with each other. She gets emotional again.

Mom thinks Ben was more excited to see JoJo. UGH.

Ben and JoJo have a talk and share a kissy, kissy, kissy moment. Then, he sends her off.

The look on his face is that of uncertainty as he walks back to the house. When he does, Dad tells him that either woman would say "yes" if asked. Dad says both are great.

Dad says that Lauren was polished, but JoJo was answering questions before he even asked them.

Mom says that she wouldn't be disappointed with either choice.

I think Dad is team Lauren and Mom is team JoJo though.

Mom knows he has a big, big decision coming. She doesn't know how he's going to decide.

Ben gains ZERO clarity, or so he says. Good for him though - he's been praying about it.

One more final date with each. Date #1 involves a boat, of course. Here comes Lauren on a raft.

The producers need some original ideas. How many dates on a boat can a guy have?

Lauren can tell Ben is stressed. She asks if he's slept. He hasn't. "What are you thinking right now?" "You're beautiful" is all she gets from him.

Lauren is starting to get nervous even though she's secure in their relationship.

They hang out on the beach, and Lauren asks if she has any doubts about her or anything she can address for him. Ben says he gets nervous when things are too good to be true. He knows he has loved her, even if at first he didn't know why.

He loves her, but he doesn't know what things look at when life looks hard with her. My memory must be going, but I don't remember what all these trials with JoJo he has gone through other than the grilling by her brothers. (Someone on Twitter reminded me of how she got flowers from her ex the day he came to Dallas to meet her family.) Ben now thinks maybe she is too polished - even his parents mentioned that.

Things don't go much better after they washed off the sand and he arrived back at her suite for the evening portion of the date. So somber. I'm beginning to think things aren't going well. Poor Lauren is doing her best to assure him.

Ben tells Lauren, "No matter what happens, you've made me a better person. You've made all of this worth it."

With tears in her eyes, Lauren can tell she's in love with JoJo too. At this point she realizes she might be done. After a little more awkward time, Ben leaves and Lauren thinks she may have heard Ben tell her that he loves her for the last time.

Ben wakes up feeling a little uneasy. He can see his life with either woman. There was something with Lauren from night one. It took a while longer with JoJo, but that whole "I'm myself with JoJo thing.

He's praying for clarity again. 

He greets JoJo passionately. They get into a Jeep and explore.

Ben doesn't seem quite as shut down today. JoJo is confident and has no concerns. I don't think she realizes there's anyone left. Ben has become her best friend, and she says the feeling is mutual. Maybe. Maybe not.

They find a blue hole to go swimming in. Much like their last date, they find a rock to sit on. She brings up the logistics of what happens after this. He's in Denver, she's in Dallas. It isn't' until this minute that it dawns on her that there are two people left and he's confused.

JoJo's mind is blown that he's unsure. They are no longer on the same page. "Why are you so confused?" she wonders.

JoJo has one last chance when he arrives at her suite to win his heart. She's more me me me than Lauren does. In a whiney voice, JoJo says she's scared and nervous. Instead of reassuring him, she wants reassurance. Ben grows more impatient with her than he was with Lauren.

She's never been more scared of anything in her entire life. Ben uses more words with her than with Lauren. I think the tides are changing. I don't think the fact that he can voice his emotions in this case is a good thing.

In the bathroom, JoJo is in the floor saying she needs something from him. He's like, "look, I'm in the floor with you. I love, but I'm telling you exactly where I'm at."

"You love her too, don't you?"

"Yes."

"Have you told her that?"

"Yes."

She feels foolish and naive. Has she never watched this show?

Ben tells JoJo that he doesn't want to leave, but he does. They exchange "I love you" as he leaves.

She starts bawling after his exit. Ok. I get that.

When he leaves, he feels awful. 

The next morning he wakes up with no more clarity. He doesn't know what he's going to do. When Neil Lane shows up, he doesn't know who he's picking out the ring for. Neil quizzes him about the lady's personality, and Ben is speechless. 

Ben thinks things with JoJo is real. He's not sure about every day life when things get hard with Lauren, but he knows what he has with Lauren is real.

All of a sudden (thanks to editing), he realizes who the person is and picks the ring.

One thing is for sure, he's going to put them both through the rose ceremony. He's not going to send anyone home early in order to save a little embarrassment. Maybe it's so that he can change his mind. 

Ben is a bit jittery on the beach as the first helicopter arrives. Chris Harrison welcomes the first woman, JoJo. The music is kind of somber.

Over the past couple of years, JoJo has had relationship envy. Now she feels like she has something everyone else can be jealous of. Supposedly, Ben has promised not to blindside her. Will he today?

JoJo doesn't let Ben talk to her. She hogs the conversation as if she's saying her wedding vows OR is going to talk him into something. "You've not only become my best friend, but the man I have fallen in love with." (something close to that)

When she finally stops talking, Ben has to take a moment to collect his words. His speech is not as rehearsed. When this started out, he didn't know if he could find love. "I found it with you, but I found it with someone else more. I don't want to let go because I can't, I don't want to say goodbye."

He really does stumble over his words. I would want to as well, but you can tell she really wants to get away and get away quick.

"I'm so confused and blindsided. You said I was your best friend... where did it go wrong?"

He continues to try to explain as he walks her to a limo rather than back to the helicopter. It's the ride of shame with lots of tears and confusion.

Ben seems pretty shaken up after the goodbye. He hated doing it, but he loves Lauren so much. It's a love he can't lose even though he could have married JoJo.

Before Lauren arrives, Ben calls up her dad to ask permission to marry her. He gets a blessing from not only dad, but the entire family.

Ok, even though I'd actually not want a guy to ask my dad's permission, I have to say, that was a sweet moment.

Lauren is overwhelmed. She's not all that confident today, at least when she gets off of the helicopter. She finds some of it though as she gives her speech. Ben is slightly more eloquent as he says, "I never want to say goodbye to you. I want to wake up every morning and kiss you on the face."

One knee, ring, proposal, kiss, trumpets sound... final rose. "You're my person." How very Grey's Anatomy.

Lauren needs her roots touched up.

I don't know that it was all that dramatic. Maybe there will be more "After the Final Rose."

The after show jumps right in bringing out Ben. He is ready to show Lauren off. It made his stomach hurt to watch any of the show back. He's watched bits and pieces.

How did he decide? Ben says it's in talking to Chris Harrison and when he asked who he couldn't live without. He couldn't see his life without Lauren.

The goodbye to JoJo wasn't easy, and it will be hard to face her tonight. After a commercial break, he does.

Chris jumps right in asking what JoJo has to say for the first time to see Ben after getting blindsided. Ben tells her nothing he said was taken lightly and that he meant what he said. It's not any less awkward now. He wants the best for her forever as she'll always be a part of his life.

JoJo said it was gut-wrenching to watch, but it helped to see that it was hard on him. Chris Harrison asked if it helped to see how he felt for Lauren. She said it did because it was obvious how early on there was a connection between he and Lauren.

I give it to JoJo for being graceful and saying she wishes the best for Lauren as her friend.

After yet another commercial, Chris prods JoJo to ask Ben any questions that she has. She asks what that final factor was since he seemed conflicted to the last day. He just let himself really feel everything instead of being open to either, and he decided it was Lauren he wanted to be with.

At halfway through the show, we still haven't brought Lauren out. We're still with JoJo because it is announced that JoJo willl be The Bachelorette. The announcement was very anti-climatic.

Insert commercial again... Ben thinks JoJo will be a great Bachelorette. Finally, we meet the future Mrs. Higgins. Instead of being able to focus on them, Chris Harrison asks about what she felt when she found out that he loved JoJo too.

I have to be honest... by this point, I'm starting to tune out.

What's next? Lauren will be moving to Denver in the next few weeks. The families are here. Have they met? "Our families are here?"

"Have you talked about a wedding?" Obviously these two don't know what Chris has been telling everyone all night. Jimmy Kimmel pops up out of the audience to ask stupid questions, complete with Barbie dolls (in relation to the Fantasy Suite - just imagine - that's it).

After one more commercial, Chris is going to see if Ben will make good on his wedding statement from last week.

Chris puts Ben on the spot, reminding him of his words. Having Preacher Denny there was a shock. Lauren is wearing white...

Ben says thank you to everyone, but she thinks that they both deserve planning out a wedding.

Since all of her family is there (a surprise to her), he wants to re-propose to her in front of her whole family. Both families are super happy.

And so ends another season of The Bachelor. I have a two-month break before JoJo's season.

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