Are you fighting your own Bathsheba Battle?
Part 2 of an
Interview with Natalie Chambers Snapp,
Author of The
Bathsheba Battle
Who hasn’t
had their lives turned upside down when things haven’t gone as planned? We
understand there are consequences to our decisions, but how do we deal with the
aftereffects of the choices of others? There are other times when things happen
beyond anyone’s control. Circumstances can leave us feeling hurt and stuck, but
God promises healing and hope for all.
The
story of Bathsheba may seem like an unlikely source of inspiration, but Natalie
Chambers Snapp explains, “Bathsheba is often portrayed as the adulteress—as though
she was a vixen with the intent to tempt David and hopefully, take her on as
his wife. However, the fact remains that she was a victim of David’s own
desires and paid a very dear price for his sin.”
In this interview, she share’s more about her
new book, The Bathsheba Battle (available from Abingdon Press).
Q: Who did you write The Bathsheba
Battle for?
How did you intend the book to be used?
The Bathsheba Battle is written
for anyone who has ever asked the question, “Why me, Lord? Why do I have to
suffer through this?” It’s written for anyone whose life has not turned out the
way they had planned. And it’s written for those who want to learn how to
embrace suffering and humble themselves to the trying, but beautiful,
reconstruction of it all. I intended this book to be used as a great
encouragement – Bathsheba is an inspiration! Towards the end of David’s life,
we see a woman who has grown in confidence, grace, and wisdom. Her
deconstruction led to a very inspiring reconstruction but her complete story is
often unknown!
Q: You dedicate a chapter to trauma. Why
is it so important to understand what trauma is and its effects on us?
Trauma is
often misunderstood. More of us experience what would be considered trauma than
we actually realize. Trauma is anything that causes us to separate our lives
into a “before and after.” For example, my life changed trajectory after my
divorce and the death of my father. There was a “before Natalie” and an “after
Natalie.” It is extremely important to get professional help after experiencing
trauma as it will impact our physical, spiritual, and mental health if we
don’t. I am a firm believer in seeking counseling, and in fact, I’m in the
process of becoming a licensed counselor myself!
Q: What is unique to shame as an emotion?
What does shame do to us, and how can we work to overcome it?
Shame is
very, very sneaky! Oftentimes, we confuse guilt with shame, but there are times
when guilt can be a positive thing. Guilt tells us we did something wrong and
need to make it right while shame tells us we are a terrible person and aren’t
worthy of anyone’s love or respect. Shame takes healthy guilt and allows it to
penetrate the walls of our souls until they crumble into a heaping mess. Just
because I make a mistake doesn’t mean I’m a terrible, awful person. However,
shame will try to make us believe that lie.
The first
step in overcoming shame is identifying it. The second step is refusing to be a
prisoner of shame by having grace with yourself. So often, I find I can easily
extend grace to other people, but I have a harder time doing so for myself.
This is because we hear the voices of shame telling us we shouldn’t! There is
nothing Biblical about living under these chains.
Q: What is righteous anger? Even when it
is righteous, why do we need to let go of our anger as quickly as possible?
Righteous
anger is anger directed at sin. For example, when Jesus turned the tables in
Matthew 21, he was angry at their obvious sin. However, we also see Jesus let
that anger go. If we hold on to righteous sin, we will become angry,
legalistic, and so black-and-white that we turn others away from our faith.
Q: How do comparison and fear both rob our
lives? How can we protect ourselves from letting that happen?
Comparison
is rooted in fear. We often find ourselves comparing when we fear we are not
enough. Understanding that we all carry a different load and God has entrusted
you to be who you are and carry your specific load helps tremendously in the
comparison trap.
Q: In what ways are grief and fear
similar? What are some situations other than death that we grieve?
I actually
am not sure I would say grief and fear are very similar. Grief is a natural and
healthy price we pay for being willing to love. Perhaps, if we allow our grief
to overtake our lives for too long, then it could be rooted in fear. However,
for the most part, grief is a natural response to love. We can grieve the loss
of a relationship we wished we had but don’t. We can grieve a life we thought
we might live but don’t. And we can grieve the death of our dreams when it
becomes apparent they won’t occur. The trick is to work through that grief and
seek help so we don’t stay there and allow it to become fear.
Q: Self-care is so important, but why do
we feel so guilty for taking care of ourselves?
It really is
important, but we absolutely need to change this mindset of guilt! I think
women often feel guilty about prioritizing self-care because we are natural
caregivers. We often prioritize the needs of others at the expense of our own,
or maybe that’s just me? I suspect it’s not, but it’s a hard habit to break.
Thankfully,
I’ve seen a shift in the culture of women now cheering each other on to
prioritize self-care more, whether it be through time with friends, going on a
long walk, getting a massage, or simply just taking a nap. I’m trying to
incorporate one act of self-care into each day, and let me tell you, it
definitely makes me a better wife, mother, and person in general!
Q: What is the single most important thing
you hope readers will learn from their study of The
Bathsheba Battle?
I wrote The Bathsheba Battle because so many
women approached me after speaking engagements to confide that they relate so
much to Bathsheba. Yet, there is little out there on this remarkable woman of
Scripture! My prayer is that those who are suffering will find hope in
Bathsheba’s inspiring and remarkable story and choose to live as a survivor
rather than a victim. I want others to see that they can emerge victorious and
will if they place their hope and trust in God—who is closer to them during our
periods of suffering than we can even imagine. Most of all, I simply want
others to find hope, because hope is always present if we choose to see it.
Learn more at nataliesnapp.com. She can also be found on Facebook (@AuthorNatalieSnapp), Twitter (@nataliesnapp) and Instagram (@nataliesnapp).
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