Living the life you’ve always auditioned for
Part
1 of an interview with Lisa Lloyd
Author
of Chasing Famous
Q: The phrase “chasing
famous” brings to mind some vivid images. How does your book spin the idea of
fame?
As an actor, when I think of “famous people,”
they are on another level. They are esteemed, rich, and successful—they appear
to have everything. I want to be them and chase after what I think is bringing
them their success so I can have it too. There’s an L.A. actress who
beat me out for a role in a TV movie about a year ago, and now I see her
all over the place on national commercials. She’ll pop up on TV, and I’ll
think, Oh, goodness, this girl again!
In the deep recesses of my heart I wonder, What
do I need to do to have her success? Do I need to take a different acting
workshop? What if I lived in Los Angeles—would I have access to the things she
has? In my jealousy I ask, If I was
in a different situation would I be able to have her success?
Whether we are actors or not, we all want some
level of fame. We chase after it. We look at other people, compare ourselves
and say, “If only I were doing what they were doing . . . If only I had that
house, body, or family situation . . . If only I was in their circumstance,
then I would have their success and fame.” Sometimes we go after what we want and
someone else has, or we live depressed because we will never have it. That’s just
idolatry, right? It’s very “me-focused,” and because it’s so self-focused, it will
never bring fulfillment because my focus of self is the complete antithesis of
focus on God.
God wants to be glorified through me. He wants
me to chase the fame of His name, not the fame of mine. He wants to use my past
mistakes, talents, and everyday life for His glory. My book helps us know how
we can chase the fame of God’s name with everything in us, though everything in
us clings to our own self-preservation and chases after our own glory.
Q: As an
actress, the pressure to seek fame and fortune must be heavy. Share with us how
you came to seek to put God in the spotlight and eventually write your book, Chasing Famous.
I
drove to an audition one day, reviewing my lines and wiping my sweaty palms on
my pants. I focused on thinking about what I needed to do to book the job. I
just sensed the Lord say to my spirit, “Lisa, I need you to be more concerned
about making Me famous at this audition than yourself.” It stopped me emotionally
because I never really considered the magnitude of glorifying God in my work. I
always just kind of threw up a prayer that was very me-focused, “Lord help me
book this audition for the paycheck and the sake of getting to work on my
craft.” But really, deep down, I wanted the applause when people saw me on TV.
My desire as an actress was the glorification of me. To hear the Lord say I
needed to focus on the opposite was a radically new thought.
As
I drove, I considered making God famous at the audition would look like me
walking into the building asking God to shine through me. To be focused on the
other actors auditioning—to talk with them and ask them questions about
themselves. To stand before the director, not concerned about being chosen, but
being a light. To offer the gifts and talents God’s given me as an act of
worship. Then the booking of the job was not up to me
but
to Him.
After
that audition, I saw all over Scripture how God has positioned and purposed us
as His glory—and image-bearers—to proclaim the fame of His name to all the
world. Then I was asked to speak somewhere, and every subject or topic I spoke
on came back to the reason of why we
do these things (parent, trust God, work toward racial reconciliation, etc.).
It’s all because it brings God glory and makes Him famous.
Q: How are our
lives similar to one audition after another?
In
an audition, I’m hoping to be pretty enough, quirky enough, talented enough,
funny enough, and fashionable enough so I can be the one chosen. Many people
have to agree on me to book the job—the director, the producers, and the
client. In life, I’m constantly walking around hoping people will like me,
choose me, approve me, select me. I want to be enough for them. Sometimes this
is blatantly obvious; other times it’s very subtle, and we don’t even know we’re
trying to be enough. It’s only when we realize we’ve already been selected by
God and have to do nothing for Him that we find peace. Now we can live a life
of security, knowing our job is not to be selected, but to point people still
seeking approval to the One who gives it unconditionally.
Q: Striving to
be the best at something, whether it be a loving spouse, supermom, or excellent
employee, is nothing new, but how has social media made us even more
competitive?
Social
media is the perfect place to hide behind a screen, showing the world only the
good stuff of our lives. Seldom do we become vulnerable and share how we struggle.
When we are vulnerable, we set ourselves up for people’s pity and let them see
a side of us that’s not completely “with it.” We have to answer to this as
people comment beneath our posts. Instead we just see (and often post)
achievements and successes.
A
friend of mine on social media is a model, and it’s easy for me to compare
myself to her. I get sidetracked from my true Identity and fail to remember God
doesn’t want me to be her—God wants me to be me. When I’m sidetracked by who I’m
not, I lose focus of Whose I am.
We
can combat this when we dare to be vulnerable on social media. Vulnerability
breeds vulnerability, and it can set people free to know they are not alone and
Christians do not, in fact, have it all together. We all need Jesus, and we
make Him famous when we say so.
Q: You write, “God
delights in using our shortcomings, and even our former disdain for His name,
to His glory.” Can you give us an example of how He’s used your experiences for
His glory?
Though
I was a Christian as a teenager, I didn’t live like one. I wanted to but wanted
the love of people more, especially boys. I lost my virginity at 15, and by the
time I was 18, I was pregnant. I was headed to college and was terrified. In
the center of my crisis pregnancy, I thought my only viable option was abortion,
so that’s what I did.
A
month later, a Christian friend of mine reminded me God had plans for my life,
but it was up to me if I wanted Him to fulfill them. He couldn’t press forward
with all He had for me if I was living as I was. I needed to give up my current
way of living to experience God to His fullest. In that moment, I saw my sin
and wanted nothing to do with it. I wanted to change. I asked God to forgive me
and felt Him say to me there was nothing I would ever do to make Him not love
me. He told me I’d need to leave behind the friendships and behaviors that were
currently easy for me. If I did, He would make it worth it.
This
story is why I am who I am and do what I do. It’s why I’ve written this book
and want to live for the glory of His name.
Q: You
experienced a dramatic redemption with Christ. What would you say to the person
who is too entrenched in pain, frustration, anger, or guilt to see the reality
of Christ and the true freedom He offers?
I’ve
met many of these people, especially after they hear my story of premarital sex
and abortion as a teenager. To these people, I ask them what they’ve seen in
God’s character that tells them He will respond any differently to them than He
did to me. There is nothing. It is Satan who has us believing God will hold our
records of wrongs against us when, in fact, God wants to give us freedom so He
can use our past to show others how amazing He is! It takes bravery to trust
God in this and give up the shackles we’ve grown accustomed to, but there is a
free life waiting for us. The prison door is wide open for us to leave through.
It’s up to us to walk.
Q: Has playing
so many characters and personalities made it difficult for you to find your own
identity and purpose in Christ? What do you do when you discover your focus has
shifted back to self?
Not
so much playing the characters, but my purpose gets skewed when I try to find
my identity and value in my work as opposed to God. At any moment, I could no
longer be an actor—I could be in a car accident, for example. If my worth is
tied up in my career, I will be lost. My worth must be wrapped up in the fact I’m
God’s. This is easy for me to say but much harder to live out.
I
have to surround myself with reminders of truth, such as time in the Word, time
with my godly husband, or time with a godly friend, to put me back in
perspective. If I can remember that being an actor or booking the next job won’t
give me the applause of Jesus when I get to heaven, then I can usually get back
on track. However, I often need outside sources to remind me of this when I’m
consumed by my own thoughts. It’s important I work to have those sources of
repetitious truth at the ready.
View the book trailer for Chasing Famous and learn more about Lisa Lloyd at chasingfamousbook.com, on Facebook (LisaJLloyd), and via Twitter (@LisaJLloyd).
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