That was almost too easy

I think I may have figured out a way to gain sympathy and get rid of phone sales people at the same time.

I have your attention now, don't I?

Well, as I stated last week on my blog, I have communicated recently with my brother as he is in the process of selling me insurance. Today, he came by, had my figures figured out and was ready to get me to change my insurance.

OK, go ahead, set me up.

I don't know about you, but I just dread having to deal with anything insurance related. Such a pain. Making sure that your old insurance and your new insurance don't both draft out of your bank account. Getting refunds. Overlaps. Calling customer service to cancel the old policy and getting grief.

That's the part I really wasn't looking forward to.

So, I call my old car insurance company. I listen to the menu. Choose my option, input all my info, and listen to the automated teller go on for an eternity about what my last payment was, when it was paid, when my next payment was due, what amount was due. BLAH, BLAH, BLAH, BLAH, BLAH. None of which is what I wanted to know.

I hit the 0 button for an operator about 5 times, got a "would you like to take a survey?" message and hit 0 again until I finally got an operator.

Finally I get the operator and have to give all my information again. GRR!!! So I get to the point of saying I need to cancel.

"May I ask why are changing companies?"

"My brother is selling insurance now."

"I understand. Thank you for your business."

Well, that part was really easy, and she sounded really understanding and sympathentic.

I called about my renter's policy too. I got the same somehow sympathetic "I understand" there too.

So, what I'm wondering, will this line work on phone solicitor's when they call?

"Hello, is Aud-reay..."

"This is AUDRA"

"I'm calling with JC Penney term life..."

"Sorry to interrupt, but my brother sells insurance."

"I understand. Thank you, have a nice day."

"Hello, Ms. Jenkins?"

"Can you honestly not read my last name off of your list, because that's not it. What do you want?"

"I'm calling with Sears and wanted to talk to you about vinyl siding."

"I'm sorry, my brother sells siding." (Because, "excuse me, but I don't own my brick apartment" still didn't get them off the phone fast enough.)

"I understand. Thank you, have a nice day."

"Is the head of the household available?"

"Whatever you are selling, I've already had to buy from my brother."

"Sorry ma'am, I understand. Goodbye."

The next time a couple of Mormon guys come knocking at the door...

"Oh, hey guys, I'm busy packing so that I can join my brother for our big show in Branson next week."

"I understand. You must be one of us. Have a nice day!"

Try it... it just might work.


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