My seemingly irrational fear of squirrels

Most of us fear something irrational. Or maybe with good reason. I dare say that my new fear is unique. Two or three weeks ago, Rachel and I were walking around my neighborhood. As we were walking along, we walked beneath a tree where a squirrel was chattering its head off. I'm going to venture as far as to say this squirrel was "screaming." I looked up, ducked around in a funny side step and said, "I don't want that squirrel to fall onto my head."

At this point, I'm pretty sure Rachel thought I was a few nuts short of a bushel. Some people I know were a little bit behind us, and I'm pretty sure they thought the same thing.

On Sunday as I drove over to my parents' house after church, a squirrel was crossing a power line as my car drove under. I thought, "if that squirrel were to fall off and onto my car, I bet it would make a dent." It made its way across. I don't know why I've had such a thing about falling squirrels lately, but I've never given it much thought before.

Yesterday, as Rachel and I were walking, we were talking right along when all of a sudden the leaves above us started rustling. An acorn fell to the ground followed by a squirrel. Splat right smack onto the street not more than a few yards from us.

At this point, we just started laughing like crazy people. Much like a cat, I think the squirrel landed on his feet, but he just laid there a minute. A car was coming, so Rachel starts walking across the street to make it stop. She couldn't bear to see it get run over after its drop. I, however, think it would have made for a funnier story.

The car would likely have passed over with tires on either side and surely thought Rachel was just this side of nuts herself. The car slowed down, backed up a little and drove around. Rachel was committed to picking up the squirrel to protect it if need be. She got within about a foot before he did jump up and run on away.

Through this whole ordeal, I'm just laughing on the side of the road. Once Earl (I call all squirrels Earl, it's a rather stupid story and family joke) went about his merry way, Rachel crossed back to the other side and we went on our merry way.

Then I said, "see, you just thought my fear of falling squirrels was stupid."

"Yes, I did."

"And it was realistic after all."

"Yes, it was."

A few blocks further along, I hear leaves rustle again. I look up, see Earl's cousin, and do a funky running dance to the other side of the road. This is when Rachel gets her best laugh in.

"I thought you didn't run. That was pretty entertaining right there."

Thankfully that squirrel kept its balance and stayed up the tree where it belonged.

So, now, if you've read this story and "wonder, what's the big deal?" maybe you just had to be there. Or, just think about it... have you ever known anyone scared of a squirrel falling on their head? That picture right there should be funny enough.


Thomas said…
Mirta Lu said…
Life can be really funny sometimes. You were not very fond of squirrels but you have had quite the weird encounters with them. The only good thing is that you haven’t run into them at home, in this story, at least. Check for openings leading to the house. It will be hard to keep them from the garden, but you can at least feel safe from them in your house. ;)