Monday, July 25, 2016

There are good guys out there, but they are all in love with #thebachelorette


Tonight, we pick up with a recap of JoJo being decided to tell Luke bye. At least her camera interview said that. But, Luke asked to talk to her before the roses were given out. He wanted to make sure he understood that not only did his heart belong to her, he "is in love with her." Because saying it exactly like that makes all the difference in the world.

At least to JoJo it does.

She breaks down into tears and wanders the runway in agony over her decision. Will she do the right thing?

Here's the thing. If you don't like the first one you choose, you can actually decide on another one later on because chances are, you won't make it down the aisle.

The whole season, there was just something about Luke. Maybe his intensity. HOWEVER, last week, in Burnet, Texas, he won me over. He just did.

So, what's a girl like JoJo to do? That's where we pick-up tonight.

The rest of the men wonder what is going on and comment on Luke's timing when he walks back in. He's not leaving. Robby thought he might have been leaving.

Luke wonders if it is too little, too late? Is it.

First rose goes to Jordan. (Yuck!)

Second rose goes to Robby. (Double yuck.)

Third and final rose goes to Chase. (He was my pick up until last week.)

Now, Luke has to say his goodbyes. With a courtesy pat on the back from the other men, JoJo cries on his shoulder. The poor guy seems shell shocked. 

JoJo claims it hurts her so much. She thought their relationship got better over time, but she still didn't know where they stood. "And we'll never know how it could have turned out." He stands up to leave with an almost robotic expression and she starts bawling on him.

"I had no clue I was squandering away. I thought when I looked in your eyes and kissed you the magic was real. I thought you knew that."

He can't get free from her grasp. "I can't believe it's over already." His expression reads, "GET ME OUT OF HERE!"

Part of the problem, as through the whole season, he just doesn't articulate well. He doesn't ugly cry in the limo. He's just shocked. He was in love with her, but never got the chance TO love her.

The three remaining guys awkwardly stand around while JoJo is freaking out within sight of where they are standing. "I miss him already."

Well, suck it up, Buttercup, because life goes on, and it's off to Thailand. Land of Buddha statues and monkeys.

At least that's what they show.

JoJo seems to have gotten over that whole Luke thing during the commercial break.

The first overnight date belongs to Robby. He arrives on some sort of tuck-tuck thing. 

That big hair does not go with his flip-flops. They try local delicacies as they walk through the market. Suddenly, they are stuck roaming around in a monsoon. Wonder what that will do to Robby's hair. Nothing. They wait out the thunderstorm by having a pedicure. Actually, it's probably just more of a foot massage.

While getting their feet rubbed on, Robby tells her that he has been honest with her since day one. That old ex-girlfriend that came up back home means nothing. He falls in love with her more each time they are around each other.

JoJo has been falling more and more in love with Robby this whole time, but she has her concerns. "It was this exact day last season..." that JoJo told Ben she loved him only to get squashed like a bug even though he said it back to her at the time.

"So you told your family what you thought about me?" Robby shares a note his dad stuck in his pants pocket which encouraged him to go for it with her. He found it while "changing for bed." Guys say that?

Then, JoJo pulls out the fantasy suite card from Chris Harrison which is really awkward when you think about it. "Hey if you want to do... go ahead, you have my permission to do it officially on show time now."

"I finally don't get dream with JoJo, I get to dream with her."

JoJo is ready for intimate time with him. So that's just basically saying it's "test drive" time, right? Once upon a time, they weren't so blatantly blunt about it.

JoJo can see waking up with Robby every day for the rest of his life. She has decided it is best not to say anything about her love until she is sure at the end whether she means it or not.

So, she leaves Robby to go with Jordan. I bet there's a boat involved.

And, I don't just mean the boat he arrived on. Today they are going to get very hot. Literally, she says. They are going on a challenging, steep hike. He better have brought better shoes than those sandals.

They take a deep breath before starting up the trail. Better them than me because they are huffing and puffing before they even get started. They venture up to a cave, then descend into it. The next cave them brings them to a temple. She wants to respect tradition, so she covers her shoulders and won't kiss in the temple.

She knows there is the physical chemistry, but can she have the long lasting love with him? When they sit to talk, she mentions her family coming soon. Jordan asks about her family. He always imagined being able to look his future father-in-law in the eye, and the dad would just know he would take care of his daughter.

I don't like Jordan, but I don't like JoJo much either. Oh, they can have each other. We're not picking my future husband. 

JoJo wonders if Jordan is ready to commit. Can she trust him? Will he break her heart?

During the evening portion of the date, JoJo has so many questions. Jordan muses over asking her dad. He is so confidently cocky. She whips out her Texas twang and asks what the next year looks like for Jordan since they haven't talked about their future.

Jordan then says something, and JoJo says, "Ben said the same thing." I was too busy tweeting to know exactly what. It was probably just "I love you."

"But how do I know you mean it?"

Jordan scrapes together an answer that's convincing enough for now. The whole "you make me a better person" kind of thing. With that, here comes the next Creepy Chris invite for a test drive. Everyone knows it's coming. Of course, there's no need to discuss. At least it's a different room.

They both love each other, according to JoJo.

Jordan rolled over this morning with a smile on his face. Or so he says. She says waking up to him was perfect. But, it's scary being in love with two people. She doesn't know what to do. She's starting to understand what happened with Ben.

And then there's Chase. Will she decide she's in love with three men? That would be exciting, but scary.

JoJo is looking forward to this date, and he arrives on a motorcycle. She has a fun day plan for them. He just has to follow along. This is the boat date?

They smell something fishy. It's fish. Fish juice drops onto his shirt as he holds one up. It grosses her out.

She loves that he's so into having fun today. It's not a yacht, but they do go out on a boat. They try to get a monkey to wave.

They talk about how the true Chase came out during hometowns and how he wasn't sure what was up with getting the last rose at the rose ceremony.

Chase brings JoJo joy. So much joy, they wade out in the ocean to make out.

The Twittersphere finds Chase to be boring. At least he's not as egotistical as the others. Before their evening date, Chase wants to go tell JoJo that he loves her, but when there is a knock on JoJo's door, it's Robby.

Robby just keeps thinking about her. He just stopped by to suck face.

Back to thinking about Chase. She thinks she won't fall in love with him so she won't be in love with three guys. At dinner, he wants to give a toast, but it takes him a moment to come up with anything. He toasts her trusting him.

JoJo tells him he was the most playful he's ever been today. He's having a hard time stumbling over his words. He wants to be the man she deserves.

Out comes the last invite from Chris. Guess she's going to give Chase a chance after all. "I've been falling in love with you and getting over lots of fears."

JoJo is not as enthusiastic when she hears that. I think she wants to say, "that's nice, but you're my #3."

"Thank you for telling me that," is all she can muster up. She had been wanting to hear that, but she doesn't seem to care now.

JoJo has to have a minute. She leaves the room and leaves him sitting on the couch. He's an incredible person. She wanted to fall in love with him, but needs to let him go.

JoJo pulls herself together and comes back into Chase. "I've been wanting you to say those words to me, but Chase, in my heart and in my gut, I don't think I felt what I thought I was going to feel. I don't know that I am in the same place as you."

He's rightfully angry. He's shattered. It was hard for him to say, and he accuses her of not giving it a try. JoJo says she's trying to keep what happened to her to not happen to him when she couldn't say it back next week. He stabs her with, "you just did." "Why did you give me the card just to send me home?"

Chase gets up and walks out while JoJo cries after him. He accuses her of giving him the fantasy card to break his heart. He doesn't cry as he leaves. He's mad. And embarrassed. He throws in "heartbroken."

The next morning, JoJo reflects on how hard last night was. At this rose ceremony, there really is no decision to make since she sent Chase home. However, she wants the guys to accept her roses.

Chris Harrison talks with Jordan about his week. He sends Jordan on in to get his rose. It's casual though. No tuxes. Daylight. Just awkward man capri pants. Ok. Maybe a little longer than that, but still short. Robby comes up, and Chris sends him in. JoJo walks up and Chris how confident she is in these men.

The men don't know what went down with Chase last night. She starts by telling them how incredible the week was and the steps she made with them. She points out the obvious that she had sent Chase home. She tells them how terrible that was for her, but Chase walks on the scene. He wants to talk to her for a second.

Robby wants to know if you get sent home if you can wander back in. When it's just the two of them, side by side, by themselves, Robby makes Jordan look likeable.

So, Chase. He doesn't want to leave things like they did last night. Chase tells JoJo that he's proud of her, that she did something hard. He basically says, "if it doesn't work out for the others and you want to call me, here's my number. I'm open to it."

He walks off calmly, leaving her in a puddle of her own snot. Again.

She pulls it together enough to go give Jordan and Robby their roses. Jordan always first.

Each are so confident in their relationships, JoJo feels a little sick to her stomach because they have no clue how she feels about the other.

Previews of tomorrow's "Men Tell All" promises a potential fight. I hope it's as interesting as the tease.

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