The Bachelor: Matt: Week 2: God Save Us from the Queen

I true Monday fashion, I did NOT have all my ducks in a row today. No where close to it. An entire mess. I need a do-over.

Tried to get dinner done in time and sliced my thumb cutting up an onion just enough to be a complete menace. 

I'm just now getting started on watching The Bachelor at 8:09. I have my to-do list of 8 million things on my mind as I get started. Here we go...

We find Matt running, working out, showering, all while thinking about how he may have given a rose to his wife last night. As he showers, I become concerned about the bit knot he has in middle of his back. 

All the women take a walk around the resort. "It's a beautiful place to fall in love," some woman says. What a scripted line.

The women are all gathered and waiting for Chris Harrison to arrive. When he does, he congratulates Abigail on the first rose. Someone pipes up that she got the first kiss. Chris congratulates her on that as well. 

There will be a group date and two one-on-one dates. Because there is a record number of women, not everyone will get a date this week. 

He leaves the date card on the table.

"Bri - Loves is an adventure."

Bri laments that she wore her worst outfit today. She could change since she has to pack in case she gets kicked off.

Matt arrives, and they talk and walk along to a pair of four wheelers. All the women watch with jealous eyes as he puts her helmet on her. 

Inside the women wonder, "Why Bri?" Someone points out that she got the first rose of the ceremony. 

Queen Victoria is already tired of being around all of the other women. She wanted to be on that date. Someone points out that they are all jealous, but there's no sense in hating on Bri just for being the one who sent on the date. 

At first Bri doesn't start off well, but seems to get the hang of it. Once they get out in the muddy area, Bri jumps on with Matt, and they set off. Until he turns over the ATV.


Luckily, it wasn't too bad, but they are definitely muddy. 

They are going to clean off with a wood fire heated hot tub. He takes off his shirt to chop some wood. 

They bond in the hot tub to champagne and their "near death experience." Of course, since they are in a hot tub, there's going to be make out time.

At the resort with the women, Queen V is carrying on about the earlier conversation. Anna talks to a couple of other women about being a positive person and truly happy for Bri. V is complaining about Anna and saying it isn't a sorority.  

There shall be a cat fight soon.

Back to fake dinner on the one-on-one. Time to talk family. Bri's mother got pregnant with her when she was 13. Her mom focused on Bri her whole life, so never dated. Now, her mom has a fiance, is pregnant and a life away from her.

She does have a relationship with her father though he wasn't around much when she was a kid. Matt's dad wasn't around when he was a kid either. He gravitated towards friends with families. She did too. She points out a lot of parallels between the two of them. 

At the house, the women are already complaining about Queen V. The date card arrives.

"Chelsea, Serena P., Abigail, Sydney, Alana, Kristin, Lauren, Jessenia, Serena C., Kit, Kaili, Katie, MJ, Mari, Peiper, Rachael, Victoria... I'm looking for the one. - Matt"

I think that was everyone -- 17 women on one date. Someone said there was 18, but I played it again. With voiceover edits, there must be one they didn't share. 

Queen V. pouts that she'll go to get Matt time, but of course, she's whining about it.

Matt goes on to give Bri the date rose. They have their own fireworks show afterwards. 

Of course, everyone else sees them too. It's really loud, and they all go out to look. See, that's the downside of resort dating. Everyone is really close. 

The women all say that obviously, Bri got the rose. Queen V. says something like, "This is what I felt like earlier." There's a whole conversation about who said what earlier and how Victoria was all hurt by MaryLynn. They room together, so V is moving out to the couch. She's ready to have her own room as a queen should. 

The next morning, it's rainy and/or foggy as they all go out to meet Matt. The whole group of them are going to do a wedding photo shoot. 

Lauren only talked to Matt when she got out of the car, so she's going to have to get some time in during this date. 

The women have 10 minutes to get dressed. They all rush in to find a dress. There are lots of racks, and they grab arm loads to try on. 

When it's photo time, Jessenia goes first. She also gets the first "You may kiss the bride" photos. 

Victoria decides when it is her turn and interrupts someone else's time. The photographer was going to call Peiper, but V butts in. She makes Matt take off her garter. V goes in for sloppy kisses. She's trashy. She's wearing a black bra and the dress she picked reveals said bra through the lacy back. She also spills out the front. 

Chris Harrison comes out saying Matt's woman will also fight for him. He takes Matt away before half of the women get their photoshoots. 

They head out to the woods in their dresses. They are going to play "Capture the Heart" much like capture the flag. There's going to be paint involved, so they will get uber messy between the paint and mud. The winning team gets more time with Matt while the losers go home dirty. The women get ribbons for belts to distinguish teams. They dip bouquets in paint and try to hit the other team with their color. Some slingshot paint balls. They hit each other with cake.

There are no rules, so no one knows the ultimate goal it seems. They have a referee, but he doesn't do anything.

They do have to capture a giant heart from the other side and bring it back to "base." The red team wins. Mari wins the MVB... Most Valuable Bride... since she captured the heart. 

Some of the losing women have a breakdown. Katie is especially upset for some reason. 

After cleaning up, nine women get to go to the after party with Matt. Among those here: Mari, Queen V., Lauren, Jessenia...

Lauren gets her time in first. Matt talks to her about what she's looking for in a man. She wants someone who puts God first (good girl!). Matt grew up in church. While he doesn't usually lead off with being a Christian because people have negative opinions of that, he did like her answer.

The girl he is talking to next talks about men cheating on her skewed her ability to trust. 

Another date card arrives. "Sarah - The sky is the limit for us."

The women without dates this week are 4 of these 5: Anna, Marylynn, Khaylah, Magi, and Illena. I'm not sure who I missed above and if it were Alana or Illena or both that went on the group date. 

Back to Matt. Queen V. gets her chance to be ridiculous, I mean talk to Matt. He was impressed with her as she went after the other heart. She tells Matt about her insecurities and begs a compliment saying she hoped the dress picked didn't make her look fat. There are things about her she enjoys. He challenges her to own the things that make her who she is. He offers to walk her back upstairs, but she asks if she can have a kiss first. He asks to talk to Lauren, sends her to start walking and picks up the rose. 

It's time for Sarah's date. There were some things Matt wanted to talk about from the first night. They are going to go up in a biplane which would actually scare me to smithereens. She's kind of freaking out too. They huddle up in the plane which flies over the women who happen to be outside watching. (Staged, yes.)

They talk by the fire once they land. How they'll miss their families during this time... Having someone who is their emergency contact number (instead of their moms?). They are both close to their moms, but she says she's close to her dad too, but doesn't say much. 

Matt can tell Sarah is holding back on something. He's looking for someone to be authentic and real, so he hopes she spill something over fake dinner. He prods her to spill some beans. It's hard for her to open up. When she was in college, her dad was diagnosed with ALS. It's been five years which has been longer than his doctors anticipated, and she quit her job to be his caretaker. She wasn't sure if she should come on the show. She felt a calling to be here. 

Matt does give Sarah the date rose. Then, they go spend some time in the pool. 

The next evening, the 24 women arrive for the cocktail party and second rose ceremony.

Jessenia thinks it's going to be interesting as the women who didn't get dates are going to be going after Matt. Yes, I just used the word "going" three times in once sentence. 

Abigail gets some time first. At least that's what we see. They come up with little codes to let each other knows they are thinking of each other in a group. 

Matt is more relaxed than the first night as he talks to the various women. 

Marylynn gets really emotional. She wants to know if she said something wrong to have not gotten on a date this week. She had mentioned her favorite flower was an orchid, so he got her one. She didn't even know if he remembered her name.

Queen V thinks Marylynn is toxic. What is toxic is the dress V is wearing is toxic. Puffy sleeved satin flower pattern. V tells Matt how toxic Marylynn has been and how she has slept on the couch to avoid her. V has her black bra on again because her straps are showing. Actually, her whole bra is showing in the back.  Matt feels bad for her and isn't going to let anyone bully her. 

If V had any friends in the house whatsoever, none of them would have let her go out and about with her bra hanging out like that. 

Matt wants to talk to Marylynn again. Since this is the second time she's gotten to talk to him tonight, that's going to make her a target. 

Queen V comes back and tells everyone that she had to tell Matt how terrible Marylynn was to her. Now, I don't like Marylynn's earlier whining to Matt, but this girl didn't do what she's being accused of as far as the viewers and most of the women in the house see. 

Marylynn doesn't want V to cut her time short here. She's worried. She's whining too, and that annoys me. Marylynn asks V if they can go outside to talk. V says she's not going outside because it's cold. All the other women leave them alone. V doesn't want within close proximity to Marylynn.

V won't let Marylynn get her sentences out. V doesn't want to make up. They keep the crazies on for the drama, but I would enjoy it more if they did not. #GodSaveUsFromTheQueen

V says the two of them are like oil and vinegar. UH, you mean oil and water? She says Marylynn is too much for her. She thinks Marylynn is a bully. Marylynn whines, but isn't a bully. 

MJ doesn't think drama is the right approach here. V tried to pull her into it, and MJ didn't even know there was an issue.


Other women don't get their time in before Chris comes in to clang the glass and call for the ceremony. 

Time for roses. Bri, Lauren, and Sarah have their roses.

  1. Peiper
  2. Kit
  3. Magi
  4. Rachael
  5. Chelsea
  6. Jessenia
  7. Katie
  8. Serena C.
  9. Abigail
Sarah is glad she has her rose because Queen V. ruined the night. She has her rose but is still overwhelmed and gets knee locked or something standing there. She almost passes out and has to have the medic come right smack in middle of the rose ceremony. Matt heads off to check on her. She's blacking out and can't see. 

That's where the episode ends.