Tuesday, August 23, 2016

Enough is enough! #bachelorinparadise

Tonight's dramatic new episode of Bachelor in Paradise. Some of these people need to be weeded out. Ashley needs to be really sent home and no one let her come back.

It's morning, and everyone is talking about Izzy. Everyone thought she and Vinny were the tightest couple there, but Izzy wants to see if anything is there with Brett.

Here's Carly in her infinite wisdom reminding viewers that she was caught off guard way too late last year with Kirk.

Vinny goes and finds Izzy to have a heart to heart. He thought they were on the same page, but the look on her face is saying, "oh, please." Izzy said she was on the same page until Brett, a guy she doesn't know, walked in. Now she thinks maybe they weren't after all. Now they are both crying. Everyone on this show cries. Vinny tells her that he is going home. She wants him to stay. Let's see if the crowd talks him into it. 

Izzy loves him and thinks he deserves more than what she just did. 

He does get in a car and leaves. 

Evan believes now that they have all witnessed the first big break-up, things are getting real. Josh and Amanda tell Izzy they are there for her. Jared reflects that this could happen to any one of them.

The next arrivals are actually Jade and Tanner, there to show them how love in Paradise can work out. 

The two love birds hope others can find the same happiness that they did. They are going to talk to each couple and see how they are all doing. The couple they think has the best potential to make it last after the show will get the date card they have.

First up, Carly and Evan. I still think Carly lost her mind, and I liked Carly. She tells them the two of them are different than her relationship was last time. She's been way more cautious. Tanner observes that Carly is trying really hard to like Evan because Evan really likes her. Nice observation Tanner. I don't think she really likes him either.

Then, Grant and Lace. They haven't had an official date that wasn't a double date. They talk about Grant having already said, "I love you," while Lace isn't ready to say it yet. It's very obvious they aren't in the same place right now. The two talk more when they get through with Jade and Tanner and it is awkward. She's not convinced they should be together. Grant wonders if their fate is the same as Izzy and Vinny's. 

They ice past Carl and his twin. I seriously can't keep them straight. Emily, right?

Next, Josh and Amanda come up for air long enough to have a conversation. Amanda explains he was the first to arrive (so was Jade), she dated Nick first, then connected with Josh. Tanner points out Josh beat out Nick again. Josh and his big smile talk about how great Amanda is. Josh begs for a date. Tanner thinks he's putting on too much. Jade shrugs.

Nick and Jennifer take their turn. Their whole four-day relationship. Nick talks about how before he had intense feelings though he realized it worked out for the best. He's approaching it different this time. 

Jared and Caila go to talk to Jade and Tanner while Ashley tells the camera how much she hopes they don't get the date card. Jade says they are glad to see the two of them together because they looked like such a good match on paper. Caila says it's working out so far. They talk about their horseback date. It's only been four days they have been together. It seems like a lot longer than that. It's been four episodes. 

Ashley goes to talk to Jade and Tanner by herself. Jade asks what her biggest hope and her biggest nightmare this would be. Her biggest fear, of course, is Jared ending up engaged. Ashley tells them she thinks Caila is a fake and that Jared is more into her than she is to him. Sabotage. 

Backfire.

The date card goes to Jared and Caila, hoping that they will fall in love where they (Tanner and Jade) did.

That night, Jennifer wants to know what Nick is thinking. She notices a wall today. Nick didn't think there was a wall. What does the woman expect after four days? 

Ok, so the date. Caila in her voice over says she's ready for Ashley to go if she's going to try to mess everything up. Jared brings up Ashley and assures her that though they are friends, that's it. He isn't interested in Ashley and doesn't want her hindering things. It's raining, so they seek shelter. No, wait, they decide to strip to their underwear and go swimming. Or wade out in icky water. 

Ashley is back at HQ whining and crying to herself. "Oh, I'm so not sexy and ugly and wah, wah, wah."

The next day, Carly and Evan are chatting by the pool. Carly thinks they are still very friend zone and that even exudes zero swag. She needs him to try to be sexy. That would scare me, quite frankly.

The twins find a date card. They read it in unison, "Evan - Choose a woman to join you for an ancient ceremony."

Evan turns to Carly and asks him to go with him. He thinks Carly wants him to be chill. He can probably put more enthusiasm in it.

As they walk up to the location of their date, it's a village and the natives perform a ceremony to release negative energy. Carly says it's right up Evan's alley because he loves weird stuff. As the drums are beat and the smoke floats up in a really small brick hut, they are urged to tell the truth. He loves that she accepts his crazy. (She's trying.)

Carly is impressed with how he looks at her, like she is the most beautiful girl in the world. She says she falls for him more every day. They poor steamy water on each other.

Back at the house, Ashley is still obsessed over how she could make out with Jared's mind. For some reason he talks to her amidst the group. He needs to run. Ashley tries to plant seeds of doubt about Caila's sincerity in his mind. Jared runs upstairs to talk to Caila. Caila starts to realize Ashley tried to get to Jared by saying that he may be more into Caila than Caila is to him.

Caila has had enough. She was friends with Ashley before, but isn't going to let her get in middle of what she's trying to have with Jared. Caila is like, "quit trying to get in middle." Ashley is like, "Jared may always trust me more."

I wish they would get in an actual cat fight.

That's it for the week!  There needs to be more rose ceremonies. 

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