Tuesday, June 18, 2013

If you can't beat them, teach their children?

It doesn't take much to realize my sometimes angst about singles and church... especially when I'm expected at singles' events.

Our preacher participates in an annual lectureship and received his topics this week. He asked Rachel about his topic, then she pointed him my way because she new I had an opinion.

Sam sent me the message below, and I wanted to share some thoughts because maybe it will help plant seeds of ideas for others.

Got my assignments for Polishing the Pulpit in August. One of my lessons is called Seven Minutes of Wisdom (because that's about all I got). The audience is college age and singles in the church. The lesson is about dealing with friends who are married with children and all the talk about is their kids or their marriage. Thus making for boring, unnecessary conversation with single friends. The lesson is about how singles should deal with this situation. I know you have faced this some, so I thought I'd get some ideas from you to begin with. What do you think I should cover in 7 minutes?

Here are some of my ideas, for whatever they are worth. They are how I've been approaching things or have been involved with in the past.

Often times, it is the singles that HAVE to make the extra effort to socialize/maintain friendships with married people at church. With their kids, etc., they don't mean to ignore you, but run in their own mommy circles. It's often up to you to make the first move. Whether you live in a little cramped apartment or more entertaining space, invite some of your single friends and  married friends together to fellowship. In a group setting like this, topics vary and it isn't all about the husband and kids. And parents sometimes like a chance out of the house without their kids.

Start a prayer group of all men or all women. When you share/pray about what’s going on in your life, you’re on a more even ground whatever your problems are or where prayer needs are concerned. It opens doors to sharing experiences that go beyond whether or not you have a family of your own or not.


Become active in teaching in your congregation. Then, you can talk to the parents about their kids. If you know their kids better, you can share stories about them too, and it’s more interesting than to hear parents drone on about their kids that you don’t know. If it’s not teaching a class, maybe it’s helping chaperon a youth retreat or lock-in. GET ACTIVE!

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Speaking of singles... 

Last Saturday, Mom asked me to go to Walmart and the Shoe Dept. with her. At first I said no (you know how I hate Walmart), but I decided to be nice and go along. There's a reason I don't want to go to the Shoe Dept. I used to hide from an employee there when he worked at another store. The girls were with me one time when I encountered him at the shoe store.

Sunday when Paige was having lunch with us, I told her, "I had to go to the Shoe Dept. with Granmal, you know what that means."

"OOhhh!" she says. "Was he there?"

Mom and I said, "yes."

Dad asks, "did he wait on you?"

"Oh, yes." in unison.

"Did he say, 'Hiiiii Audra?'" Paige asks.

"Yes!" my mom answers. They all laughed.

Yeah, yeah, I won't go next time. 



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