Monday, July 23, 2018

The Bachelorette: Men Say the Dumbest Things edition

Tonight from the previews of The Bachelorette, I can tell you that most of this blog will be pointing out the dumbest things the men say.

I didn't order my pizza soon enough, so of course, I am running late even though I planned all day to be ready to go on time. Me and my plans!

We join Becca and her men in Thailand. In Shanghai to be exact. I'm going to put all of the stupid statements in quotes because some are just cliche. THIS IS ONE OF THE MOST ROMANTIC PLACES I HAVE EVER BEEN. #bachelorettebingo

Further proof this show is scripted. She roams the streets smelling food, rides a puttputt, She arrrives at the Shangri-la and muses on how she is in love with two men and falling in love with a third.

She recaps where she is with each man. In love vs. falling in love. Best friend vs. hot attraction. Who has said, "I love you."

The first date of the week is Blake. 

When he arrives at his stop, Becca literally jumps him. I HAVE A GREAT DAY PLANNED. The problem is, after they reach a certain point along the path to the temple there will be no touching and no kissing. This is going to take some discipline. After not seeing him in so long... You know, three days or whatever.

They get a lesson in Buddhist worship from the monk at the temple. They get lessons in relationships. Honesty, compromise, patience and giving. When they leave the temple, they talk about those four things a little bit. Blake talks about how important honesty is on his interview. That's what she was looking for, Ari wasn't honest with her, etc.

Going into dinner, there are a lot of things Blake wants to get into. "Is she kissing, is she touching, is she blushing with the other guys like she is with me?" Oh, Blake. Of course she is. After the first week, there probably wasn't one guy she wasn't kissing on. #mensaythedumbesttings

"I know they don't love her like I do, so that doesn't bother me, it's more like does she love them. That's where the fear comes in."

Blake says it's been two weeks since they have seen each other. Maybe hometowns and getting ready to fly to Thailand took that long. Who knows?

Becca tells Blake it is very special that she never had to guess where he was in their relationship. She's a little scared it's too good to be true, that the rug may be pulled out from him. That leads him to talk more about getting hurt before and how his mommy came out to take care of him.

It's only been in the past two weeks where it's hit him that she may feel strongly about another man. He cannot ignore it anymore. He tells Becca he doesn't think the other guys can feel as strongly about her as he does. She doesn't say, "I love you," back. She explains saying it to Ari and vice versa last time. She won't say exactly what he wants to hear.

Speaking of fears, Becca tells him the fear will grow stronger. They only have a week and a half. Does committing to each other freak him out? "I look for reasons to stay, not reasons to go."

Becca hands over the date card with the fakest key you ever saw. Like, I've seen that key on a charm bracelet.

I hate the stupid things they say the morning after the fantasy suite. I'm kind of checking Facebook during this conversation. They talk about insecurities up to the end. Blake is my least favorite, and I'm so tempted to speed past his parts, especially all the loud smoochie sounds as Becca leaves.

THERE'S NO WAY SHE CAN HAVE THIS WITH ANY OTHER GUY. Oh, Blake, have you not sensed how awkward she was in not saying things?

Next up is Jason. 

Jason has not seen her in a week and a half. Jason is greeted with a make-out session on the sidewalk, but not quite the same excitement as Blake. They make their way along the street vendors and get a leaf woven rose before trying some crickets. Smokey, crunchy... there's a leg.

A visit to some temples. "She has everything I want in someone. There are so many reasons I love her. So many reasons I am in love with her... I have found my best friend, my partner, what I want to be my fiance." (I know the last part is worded strangely. That's what he said.)

As they leave, they talk about having an ornate house like the temple. They were joking. She asks about would he put something outside his condo in Seattle. It wasn't anything committing to the future. She asks to step away a minute. She wanted to take what she said immediately. She felt weird about talking about the future while they were having the best time together. She keeps saying she feels weird. Becca just realized she doesn't see a future with Jason. I guess she doesn't think Jason's her BFF.

They had a great day, and she had a great time with him. Becca thinks she owes it to him to see if they can get back on track. In his interview he says, "For me, I've never been focused on the day to day. The picture is what I'm here for. Now, I see a best friend. A lifelong partner. A fiance. A wife. A mother. That's so much more than a rose."

Over "drinks" or "dinner" they talk about hometowns. She didn't take it lightly. His family gave the stamp of approval. Becca looks cold as Jason talks. She's about to rip that poor guy's heart out.

Make a pouty face for the camera
Jason asks where her head is. She says, "All over the place." She talks about the brief moment where she said something about the future. She said it about herself, then felt she needed to say something about "us," then she felt like something was off. She excuses herself again. She didn't think she'd be saying it this week, but she sees it more with Garrett and Blake.

He knows this isn't a good sign. She comes back in and says it has been hard, the most difficult thing she has done in her entire life. She never once saw his walls up, even though he thinks he does. She can't put them through an overnight if she's not 100% there. Jason thinks it's about pushing boundaries and not closing doors unless she's sure. Is she confident she doesn't see a future? No she's not sure, but sees it more with the other guys. He tells her there's a reason he's still there. "There's still so much time to be had." No there's not.

Jason doesn't talk her into anything. He says he came in wishing for her happiness and will leave wishing the same thing. Becca walks him out saying she doesn't want him to leave confused. He says, "You get how I could be, right?"

#JasonforthenextBachelor I knew he wasn't going to make the cut, and he didn't come on strong until late, but he was growing on me.

Becca is wondering what she did. "He's such a good guy, and I've dated some not good guys in the past."

LIKE I LITERALLY JUST DID TO HIM WHAT ARI DID TO ME.

The next morning, Becca is still crying about it. She feels terrible for hurting him.

Finally, it's Garrett.

Garret is falling in love with Becca, but she wants to make sure doubt doesn't sneak in on him. She has been so excited for this rafting date. She thought it would be relaxing and good conversation. She didn't realize everyone in Thailand would be doing the same thing on a national holiday. Not romantic at all. They have a lot of fun though. Becca says she was taking in him from behind the whole time.

He said last week in his hometown, he was really able to open up with his family. They share a kiss and have many cheering them on as they watch.

She finally feels right with her decision from last night.

Garrett shares a little about being fearful of this not working after what he went through with his ex-wife. She can tell it's not easy for him at times. They both know how serious it is. She talks about what Ari was and wasn't able to say and do. Garrett says he can do his career anywhere, so can make their lives fit together better.

Garrett says he hasn't been this happy his whole life. He has a little bit of a hard time spitting it out, but does profess his love. I HOPE YOUR THE LAST WOMAN I HAVE TO EVER SAY THAT TOO. #uhromanticiguess

That works for Becca though. She pulls out the fantasy suite card. When she kisses him, Garrett is convinced she feels the same way he does. They head up to their tree house aka a tent in a tree for the night. Not near as nice as the other suite. Heck, this doesn't need a key.

The next morning the birds are chirping, the sun is shining. Love is in the air.

Becca is in love with both and wishes she had a moment of clarity. However, Jason wants a moment of clarity too. He goes to Becca's room to talk. 

Becca is surprised, but gives Jason a hug and let's him in. He didn't feel closer because it came so quickly. He wants her to know the love and care was genuine.

He may have been one of the best guys she ever met, but... Jason wanted to make sure the door was closed in the right manner before he left Thailand. He gives her the parting gift of a scrapbook before he leaves. He was going to give it to her on their date.

When he leaves, she goes through the book and cries. Becca didn't quite realize to what depths he loved her.

The men arrive to the last rose ceremony. Blake arrives second guessing everything and throwing a pity party for no reason. Garrett is more confident. In his camera interview, he's in tears. He's serious.

The men seem realize Jason isn't there when they see Becca talking to Chris Harrison when she arrives. They talk about how both men are in love with her. She does not want to say that to either of them based on what happened to her.

Becca starts off by stating the obvious. Jason is not there. Their relationship was not where it is with either of the two of them. She is ready for the two of them to meet her family. There are two of them and two roses. Yet, both still have these looks on their faces. Blake is seething that Garrett gets the rose first.

Blake is pouty as Garrett makes a toast. Again, we hear Blake say we don't think Garrett and Becca have what he and Becca have. If looks could kill, Garrett would be dead, and Blake in prison.

Next week is Men Tell All week. We have to see Jordan again. Ugh. Two weeks until Becca hopefully dumps Blake.

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