Monday, July 29, 2019

The Bachelorette: Hannah B. - Week 12 (The Finale part 1)

A two-night season finale just means we are going to drag things out way more than they ever had to be, especially given that Chris Harrison is in the studio with an audience.

But, here we go with night one.

Hannah is ready to hand out roses. She has just sent Luke packing... AGAIN.

The three men remaining are wondering who among them is going home. I say Peter stays after their time in the windmill and that Jed is leaving. We shall see if I am right.

Cue the voiceovers aka voices in their heads.

After her speech about not wanting to break anyone's heart, but she knows what she needs to do, the first rose goes to Jed. Crud. I was wrong on that one.

Ohhhhhh... I was sooooooooo wrong. Tyler gets the second rose.

Hannah takes Peter out. She says it has all been so perfect. It was like when she was a little girl and he was her Ken doll. She will always have a piece of his heart.

What is wrong with this girl?

They cry together, hug, and he leaves after a kiss on the forehead.

Her dress is awful too, by the way. and her messy top bun. The dress looks like a swimsuit top attached to a really long maxi skirt via an awkward middle piece on the front. This girl looks a mess.

Hannah is ugly crying on the curb.

Peter says it hurts, but he isn't mad at Hannah.

Peter joins Chris in-studio. He just watched it for the first time with the rest of us. Chris knows Peter was really in love with Hannah and that we all fell in love with his family on hometowns. The family joins him in the audience.

Peter knew he was in love with Hannah when the fireworks went off in Latvia. Chris asks if he still loves her. Peter doesn't think you can completely fall out of love in two months. A piece of his heart will always love her.

Hannah comes out. It's the first time for them to see each other since Greece. Peter stumbles over his words as he starts out, "Beginning with the Netherlands... hometowns that went so well... where did it go wrong?"

Hannah told him there wasn't anything wrong. She thought he would meet her family. All through the fantasy suite date. Leaving the windmill, he was so sure it was "Us." She was falling in love with him, but she was falling for two others two. It was waking up that final morning that she made the decision.

Hannah says if there was anything, she thought he was afraid to fall in love with her and that he was apprehensive about sharing his feelings. She just wish she knew sooner how he felt. Peter wants to know one more thing. She has referred to their relationship as "a slow burn..." She agrees it was passionate, but thought him not verbally saying where he was may have hurt them.

This is painfully boring as this drags on and on about what did and didn't go right. At least Peter is a gentleman.

What is awkward is his parents clapping when Chris Harrison says, "Thanks to the two of you, no one will ever look at a windmill the same." Take it a step further when Hannah says she has to confess it wasn't two times like she had previously said, but four times. Chris Harrison then points out that Peter's mom is right there. Chris adds that Luke's heart is exploding somewhere.

Then there were two...

Picking up in Crete, Jed and Tyler will be meeting her family.

But first, Hannah meets up with her family. She fills them in on Tyler. She explains until last week, she wasn't sure if she was falling in love or falling in lust. When he brought it up that was more than just physical for him, she knew he was a keeper.

She tells her family that he is a dancer. His first year of college, he was flunking English and needed some classes to up his GPA. He thought dance was going to be easy, but they weren't and he enjoyed them.

Mom grills Tyler first. Nothing interesting. Dad asks about the fantasy suite and the decision to get to know each other only. Tyler says his dad getting sick put a lot of things in perspective for him. He has no doubts about their relationship.

Hannah and Dad talk. Mom and Hannah talk. Both parents feel good about Tyler. I don't know why the brothers and a sister-in-law are there. I guess that's who they are. No intros were given.

Before he leaves, Hannah wants to talk to Tyler about what her struggle had been, and how sure she is that she loves him now. She is surprised, but she can see a future with Tyler.

I still don't get Tyler. He strikes me as a frat boy, but, what do I know?

The next day, Hannah is nervous and freaking out before Jed arrives. From the beginning, she thought Jed fit in her life. Her mom tells Hannah it's because she is about to have to make a decision. 

Her family thinks the bar is set really high after yesterday. They really liked Tyler.

Hannah lets Jed take the leading in telling their story. He's a snooze.

Dad can see a connection between Hannah and Jed, but there was a connection yesterday. Dad wants to know his goals in life. Can Jed provide for his little girl? He asks about finances. Jed's first real breakthrough is selling a song to a dog food policy.

Jed feels a little confused. He thought the family was going to see how natural they were together. He wasn't expecting Mom and Dad both to be questioning his songwriting career.

Mom tells Hannah she wasn't so impressed. Tyler was a standout.

Dad said Jed kind of beat around the bush and didn't give as straight of answers as Tyler. Hannah is miffed that the dog food commercial got brought up.

Hannah, of course, wants her husband to provide for her, but she's going to be successful and provide for her family too. Hannah wants to get past the money part and talk about Jed's feelings. Hannah can tell her Dad has issues. The way her dad tells her that he's just trying to tell the facts kind of reminds me of what my dad does sometimes. He doesn't want to be negative, but it's obvious he's not #teamjed.

Hannah steps away to think. Jed joins her. Jed wants her to talk to him and about how she feels. Hannah knows he doesn't want to talk another guy, but after Jed is blunt, she spills. She's confused because things went really well with Tyler yesterday. This is where Hannah realizes you don't date two men at the same time. Jed must have had the lead in her mind.

Jed believes in Hannah. I think he's trying not to write lyrics in talking to her.

Now... one final date with each.

First up: Tyler

They are going horseback riding again to see if he can figure it out this time. He's no less fearful of horses this time. It doesn't start any better.

The two talk about the family time. Her dad was comfortable with him. Tyler was glad to hear her feelings. It was a positive talk.

That evening, on part two of the date, they recap what a great date it was, how it was great to hear how well her family responded. She takes him upstairs.

The last date: Jed

She's anxious. Meeting the family didn't go like she had hoped. The nerves show when Jed arrives. The kiss looks awkward too. They board a boat and set sail. Evidently it's about repeating date activities. It wasn't with Jed that she went on the boat before though. The waves are a bit much for Hannah. She's feeling queasy.

Seeing Jed in Paradise (he needs some sun) would make me queasy. Hannah talks about being nervous making her queasy too. Jed admits to being nervous knowing there is still someone else there. Knowing her dad didn't believe in him hurt. That part made him sad, but it didn't change how he felt for her at all.

This date is such a downer. She's getting sick again and has to excuse herself. She's anxious about having to break someone's heart tomorrow.

How about breaking up with the guy still wearing the leather belt with his khaki shorts on the boat?

For the evening portion of the date, Jed apologizes in advance. He's nervous. However, he can't see his life without her. Hannah tells him that she's less worried than her dad is about their potential finances.

They are both in such a funk, it's putting me in a funk. They cuddle awkwardly on the couch before she leaves him to go think about her final decision for the next day.

She knows she will break someone's heart.

Chris Harrison and Hannah tease tomorrow night. Hannah says she doesn't know how tomorrow night will go.


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