Letting go of a dream

When I was a child, I wanted to be an actress when I grew up.

My grandmother (the matchmaking one) thought this dream was utterly ridiculous. On the other hand, her favorite grandchild, my younger cousin Kyle, wanted to be an astronaut. This dream was great! Yet, all fell apart when Kyle had to get glasses. Evidently, you have to have 20/20 vision to be an astronaut. It was quite the sad day.

While my brother played baseball and soccer, I begged to take drama classes. And so off and on I took drama classes over the years. I was in a few school plays over the years, and couldn't wait to take "Theater Arts" my senior year of high school because you could only take it as a senior in my small high school.

As I have explained previously, I've tried out for several plays at the local theater over the years (going back to junior high). I've never been cast in a play though.

The director had Jenny and I come in to read through a play yesterday. She was considering doing two different one act plays to take the place of the one that there weren't enough men to cast. Jenny read the part of the potty-mouthed slut for lack of an easier way to describe the character. I read the part of the naive, dateless, romance reading, hopelessly single girl (so true to life in a number of ways - especially in that the character gagged at the smell of Lysol). By the end of the short play, I had a love interest.

Well, I got an email today that the director decided not to move forward with the play as things just weren't working out. I had so looked forward to having a love interest, even if it was just in a play for 10 minutes in about 8 performances.

Actually, for scheduling reasons, I'm kind of glad I won't be in a play right now after all. It would have meant missing some t-ball and softball games, and I would have felt bad about that, even though I shouldn't have. It also would have thrown off when we had planned to take a vacation because it would delay leaving for a day and a half, and goodness knows we need every precious hour for a road trip to South Dakota. (My guilt complex can be overwhelming and for all my faults, I'm really not a selfish person.)

So, I've actually reached a decision over this past couple of weeks of trying to get into this play. I'm going to let go of my dream of becoming an actress. I think it's time. Maybe my grandmother was right. *sigh*

Yes, this last paragraph is a bit on the sarcastic side. However, I'm now going to move onto my dream of being a stand-up comedian.


Parkerchica said…
I wanted to be a dancer...but my parents couldn't afford dance classes, so they enrolled me in a discounted twirling camp at my daycare center. I was terrible at it, which is actually dangerous when you consider the flying projectiles.

Never twirled again. And never danced, except for the kid and play and the roger rabbit in middle school. Found bliss as a band nerd.
Unknown said…
Hold on to your dreams!!