Tuesday, April 7, 2009

Thou Shalt Not Fear?

Did you know that the most common command in the Bible is "fear not" or "do not fear"? I happen to know this is a fact because last year I worked on a book entitled Running Scared - Fear, Worry and the God of Rest by Ed Welch (New Growth Press).

Along with fear goes worry and anxiety. I'd have to say this would be my most frequently broken command lately. My worries and anxieties have run the gamut.

There is a very real possibility that I may have to give up my home and move out. There's a number of things that go along with that which would not be the best situation, including more family tension than already exists. (You know since my brother is still not back in a home of his own and all.) My parents will tell you that moving is a very stressful ordeal.

I'm worried about my dad. He's had some dizziness lately and is getting around like an 80 year old right now, and I don't know why. At one point, I seriously wondered if he was going to make it from the concession stand back to our seats yesterday. Mom and I are concerned about how he will make it on vacation especially.

We've had a lot projects starting at work lately, and I've been stressed out and high strung trying to get everything done that I need to get done. I'm worried about how being able to get everything done on time.

I heard a rumor last week that a friend of mine has cancer. I've neither been able to confirm or deny that, even though I know something is going on. I'm concerned about a very real situation.

A couple of people today had me really worried about something that I don't think is as big of a deal now as I thought it had the potential to be. Scared about things I can't control.

These are just a few of my worries as of late. I've really not been sleeping well either. I'm overdue for an attitude adjustment.

I've been praying about about all of these things, but I haven't really found rest yet. I'm searching for it, and I think that may be the biggest frustration. Knowing that I need to give it up, trying to give over to God, but not really being able to let it go. God has His own timing and His own answers. It kind of feels like He is speaking to me in Russian, and I'm just not getting it.

It didn't help that the other day I was really needing to do something to get away, and my mom was not cooperating. She was not recognizing how much I was struggling. She tends to play the one-up game. Not helpful. I really need to connect with a couple of my go-to people I haven't talked to in a couple of weeks, but in person, not by phone.

I need some distractions, so if anyone has something funny to share, or an idea for a funny blog, let me know.

2 comments:

kalea_kane said...

At this time, I do not have something funny to share. But I do want to share that I am praying for you. I have been in some terrible situations in life and God saw me through. Looking back now I can see it. Then it was pure torture. If I can remotely think of something fun to take your mind out of this bother, I will certainly send it your way. Remember Jeremiah 29:11

Kristi said...

I don't have any thing funny to share either - but just wanted to let you know that I would praying for you - praying for your fears to subside and for you to feel that peace that only Jesus can impart!