Anyone else wondering how much money ABC gets from the tourism departments of foreign countries. Now, people are sure to flock to Madiera, a place they never heard of until this week.
There one-on-one dates and a two-on-one date with no roses at the dates except the two-on-one. Except this time, if you don't get it, it doesn't mean you are going home. Who will not make it to next week and not be able to show Des off to their families during the hometown dates.
Des invites some of the women from last season to help her talk out how things are with the guys. I don't remember one of these women. Des asks Catherine about Sean. Kind of an awkward moment. Sean told Catherine before she left, "give Des good advice" so he is really looking out for her (or so says Catherine). Riiiiiiight.
As she talks about the guys she doesn't say anything just wonderful about any of them. That's because they are all flaky. I really think she got ripped off.
The guys come out and the girls kind of gawk via binoculars. They think the guys are hot (maybe if you don't have to look at their faces. Sorry, but that's the truth as I see it. I just don't get what she sees in these guys. But, she had to specify what she was looking for to producers, so I guess this is what she was looking for.
The first date is with Brooks. Don't really care for him. Maybe she is into his hair. They have a conversation about code words like walk and run to describe where they are on the spectrum of falling in love. Because he is past like, on his way to love.
Des is driving a mini car around a mountain up through the clouds. They end up over the clouds when they reach the top. They proclaim while holding hands, "I'm standing on cloud 9." Cheesy. Here... let's add kinds of cheese to this description. Mozzarella cheese.
Brooks is close to his family and whoever he marries will be absorbed into the family. Absorbed. Interesting word. Then, they come back to their secret words. Stepping, Skipping, Running, Finish line. They are running, approaching the finish line.
And it wouldn't be a Bachelor/Bachelorette season without a private fireworks show. I could have lived life without Des making fireworks noises and talking with her hands about how time with him is like fireworks. She could see Brooks as her husband.
The next date goes to Chris. He wants to jump up and give a fist pump Tiger Woods style because he does not want to share his time with Des, and they have a special connection. Yeah, how do you know she feels the same?
To me, and I know my friend Jenny disagrees, Chris may be the most unattractive of the bunch, especially among who is left. As they leave, the guys watch them head off. Stalkers. They go off on a yacht.
She could also see Chris has her husband. He says their physical chemistry is pretty legit. Whatever.
The date card for the next date comes. Michael is the only one who has not had a one-on-one date, so he's all cocky and excited. Drew and Zak will have to share.
Back to Chris, he says that the Chris that Des sees is what his friends see, except he's less romantic with them. He's really nerdy when he talks about it. Oh my word. He wants them to write a poem together to put in a bottle and set it out on the ocean. ENOUGH with the poems already. Cheese so bad it comes in a spray can.
"How big of a family do you want?" Chris asks. Des says 3 or 4 would be fun. They talk about meeting his family.
He's fidgety and sweating. He's lost his train of thought. He has something to tell her, but he can not spit it out. VERY awkward moment. On this show, people say "I love you" so easily, it's hard to believe he's having a hard time. He reads her another poem. Cheeze Whiz.
Off on the date with Michael. She can see herself with him too. She thinks they would have a blast together. I've yet to see that he can be a fun guy. Obsessed, yes. Defensive, yes. Demanding, yes. Serious, yes.
"If you were on a scavenger hunt and had to find 47 qualities that make a perfect woman, Des has 48 of them." Really Michael? What an odd thing to say anyway. Colby Jack.
She goes back to talking about him having her back, but she's not so sure about him really. Because of things that happened in the past, he's a mama's boy. You know how I feel about that.
He was devastated by his last girlfriend and wondered if he could ever love again after how heart broken he was. But he is starting to have these feelings again. However, you can tell that she's not really into him at this moment.
It's time for Drew and Zak to have their dates. Drew is a pretty boy. Too pretty. And Zak looks weird sometimes. There's just something.
They are going to do some go kart racing. Zak leaves Drew in the dust. Drew's all bummed.
Des takes Zak off to talk first as the winner. He's made some drawings now that they had their artistic moment and he thinks he's Van Gogh now. He wants to meet his family, but he's not saying that he loves her today.
Drew gets his time, and he says his family is going to fall in love with her. They were as anxious to meet her as he was when he came on the show. Drew wants Des to pick up his sister with him. The sister is severely mentally handicapped, and Des is in tears.
Because he opened up to her, Drew gets the rose.
Heading into the rose ceremony, all the guys are packing, knowing it could be time to go home. Regardless, they'll actually be heading home since it is hometown date time.
Chris Harrison and Des have a sit down conversation. Drew is the most attractive guy she's ever seen. Brooks makes her smile. It's finish line with him. Can't believe we have to revisit that. She's in love with Brooks, but he hasn't said it. That's where she isn't sure. But, it's not all over. She's falling in love with Chris too.
Time to give out the roses. Drew has one, so three out of four of the others will get one. We all saw roses to Brooks and Chris coming, so it's between Zak and Michael. She hasn't really said much about either of them, so it's kind of a toss up.
Zak gets the final rose. Michael is all emotional and says he was ready to commit to her for the rest of his life. At least she was honest now before she broke his mother's heart "because no girl is going to be able to measure up to you quite frankly." The cheese that comes in hot dog franks.
"Why does this keep happening to me? I'm tired of getting rejected by women. Why do I keep getting my heart broken?" He gets in the car to leave and calls his mom who responds with a "here we go again." Yes, you needed to cut this guy loose.
Previews show that the hometowns are going to get crazy. Maybe it will be the best episode of the season because it has not been greatness thus far.