Why am I still watching the Bachelorette?

I am trying to decide how long or short I want to make this week's recap. Paige had a softball tournament, so I didn't watch it live. I did watch it that night when I got home, far from my laptop. It was so painful to watch that I don't really want to watch it again to recap.

The 8 guys that are left go with Des to Barcelona from Munich. They're still mad about James still being around. 

These are the whiniest guys ever. They aren't particularly attractive. I'm still not convinced that some of them aren't looking for bachelors themselves. 

Des starts the night hopeful. By the end she's losing hope. That sums it up.

Notice how anywhere they go, "there couldn't be a better place to fall in love." Ironically, someone just tweeted that same sentiment during the show and it popped up on the screen right after I typed that.

Chris Harrison warns to use their time wisely as there will be no cocktail party before the rose ceremony. 

Drew gets the first one-on-one and he doesn't want the James situation to interfere with his date. Look man, it's only going to interfere if you bring it up. They are going to explore the city, but not before he kisses her to start off the date. They drink hot chocolate and lick each other's lips. He has to tell her about his family. His dad is a recovered alcoholic who now has cancer and is his hero. It's sort of odd he feels the need to reveal all of this at this particular moment.

Big shock, she feels closer to Drew after hearing all of this.

They go to dinner. Then he takes her out to make out in an alley. Classy. "He's totally making out, but in such a good way." He gets the make out rose, then tells all about James as soon as he gets it.

Date card time... They're going to play soccer. Brooks, Chris, Kasey, Michael, James, and Juan Pablo (the former pro soccer player). Zak will get the other one-on-one.

Juan Pablo must be the the only one without a one-on-one left. He talks about spending time away from his daughter. Does every man have a child this year?

On the day of the group date, Drew tells Kasey about telling Des about James. Kasey is concerned that he and Michael have to go on a group date with James. 

Brooks thinks Des is wearing workout lingerie. HUH? 

Des was upset last night, but says the conversation could have been taken out of context, so she is going to give him the benefit of the doubt. 

On the soccer field, Juan Pablo feels like he is at home. However, the six guys are going to have to play a women's professional soccer team. The men were confident before, but got schooled by a bunch of girls. James is not into being the goalie or anything else. 

Later in the date, Kasey wants to confront James. Don't get me wrong, I'm not a fan, but if they were just talking scenarios of what is going to happen after the show, I really don't think that what James said to Mikey is all that wrong. Life will not end if he doesn't marry Des. He knows this and is planning ahead if it doesn't come out. 

Des takes Chris out for some time alone. She reads him a cheesy poem in return for having written her one.

Kasey confronts James. #rehash Why were the guys not as mad at Mikey re: this conversation as they were at James? Michael joins in and they yeh-yeh back and forth about Michael never having a one-on-one on date. Chris is there to. I don't even know why this is happening. 

Brooks thinks there's something there with he and Des. Snooze.

Kasey decides it's time to share about James too. 

Now Des confronts James and sends everyone back to the hotel saying she isn't giving anyone the rose. James gets all teary-eyed when talking to Des. "If you think that, I should go home."

Kasey doubts James is coming back, but Des decides he needs to think about it over night and talk in the morning. He does come in and goes straight to his room.

On Zak's date, he and Des go to a drawing class. After a clothed model, they got an unclothed one, drew each other, then he goes off and ends up in a robe. Remember this is the guy who did his from home tape in the nude. I really thought he was going to bare it all. Des wasn't so sure either. Thankfully, he went with his tighty whities for the sake of all involved.

They drink wine in a cave while discussing his mommy issues. He gets a rose.

Meanwhile back at the hotel James confronts Drew about the whole conversation, etc., etc. These guys are worse than high school girls. I don't like James, but as I keep saying, I don't think it's as big a deal as they all make it out to be.

The next morning Des comes to talk to him again. James has been trying to squeeze in with the other guys on the couch and be all hunky dory which is so fake. The guys believe James really is leaving now that Des is talking to him again.

She takes him outside and away from the hotel. Des thinks she's sending him home, but he talks his way into staying. But not without plenty of #rehash and tears.

The guys see them hugging from up in the hotel. They are absolutely shocked. She resents the guys for putting this on her. He awkwardly squeezes his way back on the couch when he gets back.

They #rehash. Oh my goodness. Even if Des picks you, you probably won't get married. This show is not normal or normal life. Talking about what happens in the future if this doesn't work out is just that - talk.

Thank goodness it is time for the rose ceremony. Enough is enough already.

Drew and Zak have roses. There are only three roses left and three are going home.

Chris, Brooks and Michael get roses. Juan Pablo, Kasey and James go home.

Michael makes a snide comment about James being found guilty. Michael needs to go. He's a cocky jerk.

As James rides off in his limo, he contemplates how he was just the next Ben to the rest of the guys. Yep. You were.

Next week they head off to Madera, an island off of Portugal. We see previews of every last guy crying and Des ready to give it up. You and me both!

Please, please, please ABC, do not pick one of these guys as the next Bachelor. They are all losers.